Foul Bachelorette Frog Recipe #1- Whatever Pesto


As some of you may know, my husband has been out of town for a month for school/work related things. As such, I’ve become a bit…let’s say negligent with my eating habits. Basically, if I’ve been working all day I come home and just throw something into my mouth to make my stomach shut up, and then chase it with a mug of green tea because green tea makes everything¬†healthy.

In celebration of my husband coming back home for the Easter weekend, I’ve decided to post a series of recipes entitled “The Foul Bachelorette Recipes,” named after the meme that I feel I have been embodying for the past month (warning: if you google it, most of them are nsfw). I have made this first one twice in as many weeks, each time with different ingredients. This pesto is great on pasta, fish, chicken, and also makes a great pizza sauce.


Grab a food processor/blender cup and add:

1. GARLIC- At least a clove. This is mandatory.

2. A HANDFUL OF SOMETHING LEAFY- The traditional ingredient is basil, but I have used everything from spinach to carrot tops. Try to pick something mild tasting; I once made a pesto with 100% arugula and it made me want to rip my tongue out

3. SOME NUTS- Again, tradition says you use pine nuts, but those things are a bazillion dollars a gram. If possible, use an oily nut like a brazil or a walnut…you can use something drier like an almond but you may need more oil. Speaking of which…

4. A GLUG OF OLIVE OIL- You can use another neutral flavoured oil if it’s all you have, but olive is preferred.

5. SOME SHREDDED HARD CHEESE- A parmesan or romano or whatever else. You could attempt to use something soft, but it may gum up your mixer

6. WHATEVER ELSE YOU WANT- Some people add a bit of lemon juice to give it some tang, but I prefer to use balsamic vinegar. Feel free to add other blendable flavour enhancers like sundried tomatoes, peppers, etc.

Put the lid on and whiz the crap out of everything! If it isn’t blending very well, add some more oil until it forms a smooth, only slightly chunky sauce. Enjoy!